God is Bigger

Writing in the present now, we've been trying to get pregnant for 10 months and been receiving treatment (Metformin/Glumetza) for 6 months. It has been a long journey filled with broken hopes, supportive friends and family, physical and emotional pain, lessons learned, and of course the great advice people give, probably, becasue they just don't know what to say. My favorite of these being (obviously) "just don't think about it."  Now, I know people say this with good intentions, but come on! Let's get real! My entire life is now filled with doctor's appointments, blood tests, "charting," and medication... not to mention this is, with out a doubt, the thing I want most in life! So sure, let me just "not think about it!"

At this point though, I can really laugh at this advice and appreciate someone caring enough to attempt to provide some words of wisdom. And honestly, there is a bright side to all this.

My insulin resistance has improved tremendously (Praise Jesus!). I no longer have to eat constantly which, of course, has resulted in weight loss (and what woman would complain about that?). The downside, the medication also makes you pretty sick (possibly also contributing to the weight loss). Apparently, it takes your body a while to adjust.

At my three month check up with Dr. Wheeler, I had explained to him my symptoms and he was shocked that I had continued the treatment. (Like I said, it can make you pretty sick and I was feeling this everyday for three months!) He actually switched me to the brand name of the medication (Glumetza), which has been known to be softer on the stomach. And, I will say, I have noticed improvement, although it's not 100% better. I feel like it's a small sacrifice to achieve my goal.

Throughout this whole process I've found that it is extremely easy to lose hope and feel alone. But the best thing I've learned from all of this, especially at my weakest moments, is to praise God! Not to praise God inspite of this condition, but to praise God BECAUSE of this condition! This may sound strange, but going through this means it's part of God's plan.  So if it is God's will for me to go through all this to make me the person He wants me to be, baby or no baby, well then, I am thankful for that because God has a plan and it is for good! (Jeramiah 29:11) There's no way for me to fully understand what God has instore for me or exactly why I am going through this, but I TRUST in HIM who works all things for good (Romans 8:28)! God is bigger than PCOS and infertility! Praise Jesus!